Blind Your Ponies

Content Warning: This section of the guide describes and discusses the source text’s treatment of mass shootings, sexual assault, domestic abuse, alcohol addiction, and ableism.

“He heard the words from somewhere deep inside. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Was it God who nudged him to take a different route home? Was it God who stoked Sam’s impatience with the heavy traffic? If God had any hand in this, then life was a slaughterhouse.”

After Amy’s murder, Sam contemplates the justice of God. Sam remembers the Biblical passage from the Book of Job, which emphasizes the suffering of humanity. After the loss of Amy, Sam does not know how God can have a hand in suffering because it takes away his hope. West uses rhetorical questions to emphasize Sam’s desperation to understand how God would allow Amy to die.

“Heroism wasn’t playing hard with a chance to win, a chance to receive the acclaim and praise of victory. True heroism was refusing to quit when there was no chance to win. True heroism was giving your all in the face of absolute defeat. He thought that these boys, who were pitied by some, were learning life’s lesson sooner than most, learning that life is a series of losses.”

Sam’s depression bleeds into his coaching because he thinks that the sooner the Broncs learn that life is about losses, the easier life will be for them in the future. However, even in Sam’s depressed state, he sees the power of the team’s ability to continue trying, even when everything around him reminds him of losses rather than victories.

“Five years after losing Amy, Sam still identified with those Crow warriors who couldn’t bear life without their loved ones. He would never admit to anyone that, on a daily basis, he entertained the thought of blinding his pony and riding off the cliff to be with her.”

West uses the titular Crow legend to emphasize Sam’s grief. Sam sees himself in the actions of the Crow warriors because he cannot imagine living without Amy. Sam believes that what the warriors did reflects a type of bravery that he does not have, even though Diana later tells him that true bravery stems from living despite the pain of the past.