Trick Mirror: Reflections on Self-Delusion

Tolentino begins by discussing the numerous weddings she and her boyfriend have attended in the past nine years, describing why they go and what their reactions are. Though she understands the appeal of marriage, she does not want to be married, but this provokes emotional reactions from people. It bothers her partner, Andrew, less. He is also not questioned about their relationship as often. Tolentino includes a lengthy discussion with him in which she begins to extoll her arguments against getting married.

Tolentino then enumerates the many preparations a bride usually makes for the wedding, eventually adding up to around $30,000 for a 12-hour event. She then questions the "traditional" nature of this, as historically, weddings were private ceremonies conducted at home without special dresses for the occasion. She then traces the historical rise of the wedding industry. When Queen Victoria got married in white in 1840, the industry was quick to create new "traditions." This included an increasing focus on the bride in the early 20th century, as well as consumer activities from the creation of the wedding registry in 1924 to buying a diamond engagement ring after World War II. Tolentino also sees a shift in women's life stories from "single to married" to "from ordinary woman to bride and wife" (270) through consumption.